Do you ever feel vulnerable? I know I do. It feels like a mix of excitement, anxiousness and makes me a bit nervous. My 12 year old refers to that feeling as” nervcited”! (Don’t you just love her clarity?)
I know for many years, even hearing the word “vulnerable” set my stomach awhirl, my pulse racing and I had an instantaneous desire to dash from the room, the conversation and even the building. Seriously!
And to this day, I choose to prepare “to be” vulnerable. I guess you can consider me vulnerable with the idea of vulnerability. ;’)
So many of us are not comfortable with the idea of vulnerability let alone allowing ourselves to be vulnerable. Maybe it is because we have been made fun of, picked on, laughed at, or any number of other harmful actions and reactions humans can lob at another. Every one of us has had more than our share of those times. I can relate. I was that very over weight, bucktoothed smart kid that was picked last for intramural sports – I get it!
So why my focus on this topic? Why is my stomach a bit awhirl even writing about this (and maybe yours is too)?
Because being able to be vulnerable is to live authentically, with freedom and whole heartedly.
Vulnerability is the way to more freedom – of mind, soul and self. I spend lots of time helping clients get more comfortable with the uncomfortable and to be more vulnerable. Vulnerability is often overlooked as a route to feeling more freedom, joy and happiness.
I am certain many of you have read, enjoyed and learned from one of the best on the topic of Vulnerability – Dr. Brene Brown. She has brought the topic of “vulnerability” into everyday discussion -both in the home as well as in the workplace. Folks are getting more comfortable with discussing vulnerability and willing to be more vulnerable.
Vulnerability requires us to be open, to be real, and to take off the mask that is protecting us from additional hurt. How comfortable are you with being vulnerable? To share the good, the bad and the ugly about yourself? How does it feel to trust?
Research suggests the main reasons why being vulnerability is challenging is: because of our instinctive (and learned the hard way) need to protect ourselves, to not put ourselves or our egos at risk and to not offer up our “belly to the wolves” in a primitive sense. It is only nature’s way to protect us.
And while all of that is true, and make logical sense, I believe each of us makes a choice to be vulnerable and share our true selves, our concerns, our triumphs and our failuares or we chose to remain guarded, withdrawn and separate from one another.
It is about time for “vulnerable”, to discuss vulnerably, to be vulnerable, and to embrace all that you are. And I choose to be vulnerable. I want to live authentically, free and with joy.
And I encourage you to choose vulnerability too.
So let’s join together and agree to be vulnerable. Even if only in a small way. Start with sharing how you really feel with a friend rather than to protect that projected image of “everything” is wonderful. Or, by taking a first step in opening up a dialogue amongst your closest friends.
And if you want to chat with me about vulnerability reach out to me here.
And for those of you that reach out – thank you for sharing your vulnerability with me. I am honored you are trusting me with your truth, your deepest desires and your heartfelt concerns. I am honored to be your partner in this journey of life.